THE LAY OF THE LACER

Don't lace me tighter, sister, dear;
I never had supposed,
That it would give me so much pain
"My dear, they're not near closed."
Then I must get a larger pair
To clasp my clumsy waist,
Of this I'm sure, I cannot bear
To feel my self tight-laced.
Oh, the misery of tight-lacing
None but have tried can tell;
I'm sure that as to figure,
I cannot be a belle.
The pain, say you, it will not last?
Well! I will try again;
Lace me up tightly, sister dear,
I'll try and bear the pain.
Do lace me tighter, sister dear,
I never had supposed
It would give me so much pleasure.
"My dear, the corset's closed."
Then I must get a smaller pair
to clasp my slender waist;
Full well you know I cannot bear,
To feel I'm not tight-laced.
Oh, the pleasure of tight-lacing,
I that have tried, can tell;
Besides that, as to the figure,
I feel I'm quite a belle.
This is the teaching of my lay,
Lace tightly while you can;
Be sure you'll soon forget the pain
You felt when you began.

(Anonym)